All of us can benefit from increased self-prioritization; even small additions can have a significant impact.
In this article, I outline tips to improve self-care.
1. Develop realistic expectations of yourself and others and communicate them openly; remember that expectations may shift over time, depending on the circumstances of each individual.
2. Learn when to say "no" with less guilt.
3. Manage your guilt or inner critic by developing a kinder and more forgiving internal monologue.
​4. Give yourself a pass; we are all human after all.
5. Know your boundaries well so that you can choose when to assert yourself and when to be flexible.
6. Before agreeing to do a favor, pause, and then take time to decide what is right for you.
7. Make sure to use some of your down-time doing exactly what you want to do (especially while on vacation).
8. Understand and communicate your needs directly.
9. Take time everyday to engage in an act of self-care; just fifteen minutes of reading, breathing, stretching or walking can make a difference. 
10. If you are feeling depleted, it may be time to take a break and investigate all facets of your situation.
11. Try to let go of resentments. This is an ultimate act of self-care, as it has the potential for tremendous improvements in overall physical and mental well-being.
12. Routinely engage in self-care practices that work for you, keep them in your repertoire, and, at the same time, remember to try something new.
13. Prioritize and nourish yourself. Your stability enables better performance in all areas of your life.
14. Become a role-model for self-care, so that those around you can learn to be kinder to themselves too.

Striking the right balance of self-care is a highly fluid yet attainable practice, unique to every person. It requires increased attention and flexibility so that you can make small tweaks and changes as needed. 
Self-care should not be mistaken for self-indulgence or selfishness, it is a basic human need, necessary to maintain our own physical and emotional well-being and that of others; it helps combat feelings of depletion and emptiness, and enables us to be better role models to those we care for. The idea is to start small; little additions can have a great impact. One example of self-care is to take a fifteen minute mental break every day, either by walking or sitting in a calm area. During that time, it is important to regroup; you may choose to start with a few deep breaths. Check-in with yourself; think about how your day is going and determine whether you are feeling satisfied. If you are feeling accomplished, take time to internalize the good feelings; if you are feeling pessimistic, take a few moments to understand where those feelings are coming from and allow yourself to experience your emotions so that you may validate them. Then, make the choice to shift your behaviors and intentions, it is within your control. Commit to ending the day on a positive note. Taking time to pause and connect with yourself, an act of self-care, can help build confidence, increase self-efficacy skills, and bring some calm to a busy day.    

Ariela Bellin, Psy.D.

I very much appreciate my career as a psychologist in private practice. It offers a private space to analyze and understand the human experience, encourages curiosity and personal growth, and brings balance to intense feelings and thoughts. Being a relational therapist and doing dynamic therapy is a meaningful experience for me, setting aside time to truly listen and connect with the inner experience of another person, examining the meaning behind our actions and intentions, and turning despair into hope and comfort. It is truly unique. Being a psychologist has enabled me to be more flexible and thoughtful and has helped me adapt and move beyond my areas of comfort. Each day, I am fortunate to work with intelligent and insightful people, and form strong alliances and lasting connections. People can help heal other people; healthy relationships can be reparative. Therapy is one kind of healing relationship-what's not to love about that?

Ariela Bellin, Psy.D.
Psychologist in Great Neck